No, this isn't about Queen, but it's still a good song.

Alas, this is the first project I've done where Linux just couldn't cut it. So off to my gaming PC I went in an endeavor to create the world's best super Hero.

Say hello to Captain Cracker, defender of taste and destroyer of hunger. He leaves behind a trail of crumbs and licked fingers. His greatest enemy is water, which makes him soggy and fall apart. His greatest allies are cheese and pepperoni. When combined, they form an snacktastic force none can withstand.